Monday, October 31, 2005

STRANGE Things


The only thing remotely halloweeny that I like is Emily The Strange.

I have the Journals, One bag, her first book and the bookends. I was forbidden to get the dolls (I think the intervention that Mark and Janice staged when I said I was thinking about the dolls, was a good idea).

I love the address book because you can write a person's name and number in there but then they give you a check box to categorize that person

Either : Part of the Solution
Or: Part of the Problem

I love it!

Sunday, October 30, 2005

Oooooooh :(


Oh no....
I am feeling kind of ill...feverish and headachy.... Cold cave kind of ill
:(

The Secrets that hold us together....


...can also tear us apart.

If you haven't seen Eve's Bayou I highly recommend it.

It's one of my favorite movies.
I have it on VHS and have to get it converted to DVD.

Either way...WOW! It tugs at your heartstrings....

Hugs
M

I SAW MARS!


I stayed over at Janice's and earlier in the night she said..
"Hey want to go see planet Mars?"

I'm always one for seeing new and interesting stuff so I agreed. We ran out onto the balcony/walkway in pajamas and socks and looked up.

I think we saw Mars..It was orange colored..We kept asking each other...IS that it? I didn't know so I took a good look just to make sure that if it was Mars then I had gotten the best look possible.

It was really nice to see because it was orange, the sky was black, and the other stars were silver...so it reminded me of Hurricanes in the Heart.....
You know, those things, people and places that cause huricanes of the heart.....

So I stood there as long as I could before running back into the apartment...It was freezing out there...hurricanes or not!
Hugs
M

CRYING, CARS and Mechanics:)

I took my car in for some kind of work....
Very bad experience
I cried for an hour at the mechanic shop while waiting 5 hours to get the car fixed. Still haven't gotten it back.
:(
This sucks...I'm going to have to RAISE HADES soon.....
M

Friday, October 28, 2005

The Games Adults Play: FINAL

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU
*Smiled? Now
*Laughed? About 10 mins ago (GOSPEL vs ZORRO).
*Cried? Maybe a couple weeks ago
*Bought something? 3 hours ago.
*Were sarcastic? Maybe last weekend but funny sarcastic...not mean sarcastic
*Talked to an ex? :(
*Watched your fave movie? It's been a while. But I have it on DVD (Sound of Music and MY FAIR LADY)
*Had a nightmare? That was a long time ago... maybe a couple months
*Talked on the phone? About an hour ago.
*Listened to the radio? On my way home today. (Gold digger- Kanye West)
*Watched TV? A few hours ago
*Went out? Going out tonight
*Helped someone? Today.
*Were mean? I don't know. I hope I wasn't unintentionally mean either.
*Sang? On my way home ....Gold Digger- Kanye West :)
*Saw a movie? Will go see one soon
*Said "I love you"? It's been a while
*Missed someone? I miss people all the time
*Fought with a family member? It's been a long while. I'm a grown up now lol...
*Fought with a friend? :(
*Had a serious conversation? Last night
*Got drunk? LONG LONG TIME ago...off of NASTY Cruzan which I can't even bear to smell now without gagging :(

A LAST TIME for everything...
*Last song you heard: Gold Digger- Kanye West
*Last thing you had to drink: Water..my usual
*Last time you showered: Going to in one minute
*Last thing you ate: A half of a chocolate chip cookie
*Last CD you bought: Fighting Temptation Soundtrack...oh sooo worth it!
*Last thing you bought: DOVE chocolate chip cookies...but you can only eat half a cookie in one sitting because they have so many caloires..but they are sooo good!
Hugs M

Adventures in Babysitting

Janice and I went to Babysit for a friend of ours last night. The kids are N. (the oldest), P. (the middle), and D. (the youngest).
I had a blast.
The girls had their dinner and we had instructions as to when they could have a snack watch tv, read a book, take medicine, pray and go to sleep.
I asked the youngest if she was going to have a snack after dinner...she nodded no, and all of us went to watch cartoons....
Remember Little Audrey from the 1940s and 1950s who fell asleep all the time and had nightmares that turned out real in the end, and the cartoon always ended with her laughing up a storm?

Well we watched Little Audrey....man I laughed and laughed... you really appreciate cartoons when you are older! :)

The girls did skits from That's So Raven! They had all the lines and the accents down pat!

When it was time almost time for them to go read, the youngest D, went and finally got her snack and ate it SLOWLY so she could spend more time out watching the television...How do I know this? I asked and she said yes that was what she was doing...
I laughed...Kids are the best!

Hugs M

Thursday, October 27, 2005

The Games Adults Play: Part THREE

This is the LOVE section (silent blech) :)

LOVE, and all that
*Did you get frightened or uncomfortable seeing that as a section title? I guess so
*Do you consider love a mistake? Only when you get betrayed by it
*What do you find romantic? I can find romance in just about anything. I really can! You should see the stuff I write!
*If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest in dating you, how would you feel? Stressed for their sake...I don't like to hurt people's feelings
*Do you prefer knowing someone before dating them or going "blind"? It depends
*Have you ever wished it was more "socially acceptable" for a girl to ask a guy out? No
*Do you think the opposite sex finds you good looking? Sure. That's what they say...
*What is best about the opposite sex? When they smell nice and warm, nice hands and kind eyes
*What is the worst thing about the opposite sex? Oh FOR CRYING OUT LOUD...so Obvious!
*What would you do if you were walking down the street and saw some hot guy/girl standing on the sidewalk? Look at them and think WHOA! :)


"WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON...
*You wanted to kill? No one.
*That you laughed at? Willie...he was being earnest about his Table Tennis Tourny!
*That laughed at you? I dunno, maybe Ana...She laughed at something I said on the way back to campus from lunch at Island Melody Restaurant
*You went shopping with? Janice
*That broke your heart? :(
*To disappoint you? :(
*To make you cry? :( ALL THE SAME PERSON
*To brighten up your day? Janice
*That you thought about? Cody my brother
*You saw a movie with? hahahah
*You talked to on the phone? Janice this morning
*You talked to through IM/ICQ? Marcia my sis (we are chatting now)
*You saw? Jason in the stockroom for my mail
*You thought was completely N-U-T-Z? no one
*You wanted to be? Just me
*You trusted? Oh the list is long..just my friends and my sis, mom, bro...
*You turned down? hahahah
Hugs M

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

The Games Adults Play: Part TWO

This is the Would You or Have You Ever part of the game.

WOULD OR HAVE YOU EVER...
**Hurt yourself? Not intentionally.
*Been out of the country? Umm ...Of course!
*Eaten something that made other people sick? I'm sure I have.
*Had a medical emergency? Yep. Allergies sent me to the emergency room so they could open my throat and stop the itchies...now I have EPIPEN :(
*Had a surgery? No
*Played strip poker? No...IS it good?
*Gotten beaten up? No.
*Beaten someone up? Yes but I was eight, and this boy (about 10 yrs old) hit my brother who was four at the time and made him cry, so me and my twin ran him down and held him so my brother could knock him a few...but I swear if you would have seen my brother cry you would have done it too! (don't you judge me! :)

*Been picked on? Yup...when I was younger till I learned from my older sis how to get my own back....
*Been on stage? Yup for a Spanish skit..De esta manera bilamos a la disco asi asi, asi asi HEY!

*Been so drunk that you know you're supposed to go out on a date with someone, but you can't remember with who or when and that you faint when you look at yourself in the mirror in the morning, not to mention your breath? Um, no. Who does that?

*Slept outdoors? Yes. For the President's Award Program. I liked it ....


*Pulled an all-nighter? Yes.
*Gone one day without food? Yes.
*Talked on the phone all night? Yup, and you know what? It didn't seem as if it was all night! It was great!

*Slept together with the opposite sex without actually having sex? GEEZ....

*Slept all day? Pretty close. I've been some kind of exhausted in the past.
*Made out with a stranger? EW ....Wait ...No. No I haven't.
*Had sex with a stranger? Ok ew and NO!

*Thought you're going crazy? Yes some bad things have gone down before....
*Been betrayed? Yes. :(
*Had a dream that came true? Yes! It's really freaky...
*Have you ever killed an animal by accident? Umm...I have killed bugs but on pupose...I don"t think I could kill another type of animal and not cry..because animals cry just like people....I've heard em. I heard pigs squeal in pain, and chicken just go crazy....(umm I'm still gonna eat meat though)


*Told a secret you swore you wouldn't tell? Not if I swore no.....

*Been on radio/tv? If I have its been by accident
*Been in a mosh-pit? No...Is it fun?
*Had a nervous breakdown? No
*Had a dream that kept coming back? Yes till I wrote it down. Then it went away....

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

The Games Adults Play: Part one

I like these games that come on cards and you ask your friends questions which they have to answer...Its fun in a big group or one on one...

Here's one version
DEEP THOUGHTS about life and you in it
*Do you live in the moment? I guess so.....This is a strange question
*Do you consider yourself tolerant of others? Yes just so long as they don't try to make me feel bad for thinking the way that I think, then I am cool!

*Do you have any secrets? :( Of course. But I would tell them to the right person in a heartbeat
*Do you hate yourself? Nope
*Do you like your handwriting? Sometimes. It's kinda scrappy LOL!
*Do you have any bad habits? Depends on what you mean by bad...
*What is the compliment you get most from people? Nice smile and dimples
*Can you sing?YES...but its funny singing.. I sing but its not like I like to do it for an audience
*Do you ever pretend to be someone else just to look cool? No. Please.....I'm not 6 years old.
*Are you a loner? Sometimes

*What is your no. 1 priority in life? Being as obedient as I can to God i.e. helping others, faith trusting HIM, a personal relationship, etc etc
*If you were another person, would you be friends with you? Yes I would actually be my best friend...I'm kinda nice LOL!!!!!!!!
*Are you a daredevil? Sometimes.
*Is there anything you fear or hate about yourself? Yes.
*Are you passive or aggressive? Some of both
*Have you got a journal? Who doesn't ?
*What is your greatest strength and weakness? Well I think the strength can be seen as a weakness: Trying to believe the best about people even after they have proven that they can't be trusted.

*If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? The weakness I mentioned...sometimes it tears me up...

*There are three wells love, beauty and creativity. You can only drink out of one: Love. Hard choice but I think with the first one, the other two can come out of it...YEAH I beat the system!!

*How do you vent? Cry. Write in my journal. Talk to friends
*Do you think you are emotionally strong? I try my hardest.
*Do you think life has been good so far? Yes. Very much so. But some has been very bad and headachy....
*What is the most important lesson you've learned from life? Trials make you a stronger, better person
*What do you like the most about your body? My eyes, my lips
*And least? Well there are these corns on my little toe that no one really sees because my little toe is tiny but I see em and I feel em..they mock me LOL!

*Do you think you are good looking? Sure.
*Are you confident? Not always but you have to act your way out of that!
*Do people know how you feel? Not generally ...No
*Are you perceived wrongly? A lot....

But She's Cold

I had someone say that to/about me. I thought it was poetic...
You know when you read books in high school for literature class and you have to write esays on symbolism? Well I took it to mean cold and 'cold'.

My hands were cold and my arms were cold, but maybe I seemed cold because I was a little reticent.
I only get quiet when I am nervous or scared or hesitant or in the first of three stages of anger.

Then people who don't know me think I am being 'cold'. There are people who have known me for years (but have not truly gotten to know me), who will think that my silence is a slight on them.....

I think to myself.."Oh for crying out loud I just spent a half hour cutting up and laughing with you, can I have one minute of silence if I feel weird? Can I just settle myself before I throw up on your shoes then you really hate me?"

That's what I think.....

What I realise is that I need to communicate that weird feeling to them and let them know I feel weird, unbalanced, out of control....
Most people can deal with that....I hope.....

Feeling a little weird now but the weather is so cold outside. For the first time I like it. I have a fleece in my car with Brown Bears on it...

I had a small brown bear once named MOMO (this is really dumb) it was the best bear ever and it was the saddest thing...I had to throw him away...oh well life goes on

Talking to your friends while you are inside and the weather is cold outside makes you feel warm. I have to laugh at this because this morning Janice called me on the way to her exam. She was walking outside complaining how cold it was...I was laughing inwardly....AT least it wasn't minus 10 degrees like when she goes to New York for Christmas!

HUGS
M

Monday, October 24, 2005

Soaps and Chicken

Ok I admit
I still watch soaps but only when Janice tapes them really..so I miss it if I don't seek it out.
On Sunday we went and got some deli food from publix. The fried chicken meal...It was funny
because I think the dessert was the best and most exciting part.

I got one of those long rectangular donuts with the custard inside and the chocolate on top. Janice got a large cookie that had M&Ms embedded.
I think I rushed through my lunch at her place just to get to dessert....UGH
That's so bad because there is no rule saying that I HAVE to eat my lunch first...I could have just had my dessert if I wanted. I kinda threw away most of the lunch.

I despise silly rules engraved into my personality.
So I didn't really enjoy the meal till I got to dessert. It was soooo good...custard...yum
Then we watched the soaps that we are accustomed to watching Y&R and Bold and Beautiful.
I started watching this when I was 8 years old I think.

That is some stressful business watching the story lines.
We screamed at the TV and laughed so hard ...I was worn out by the time we were done. At least we got to see my favorite DUO Christian Le Blanc and Greg Rikaart. They play Michael and Kevin Baldwin on Y&R.

Christian actually wrote me a letter and sent a pic of himself...
He is the best! He is actually 47 but looks like 35...

He is such a good actor that when he is sad I feel like crying...He is too sweet! I want to meet him.
Hugs M

Kanye West

He's very talented. He has the stuff to back up his talk.
I Love "Gold Digger". The video was silly but the song is great. You can't help but get up and dance or sing a long in your car on your way to get some deli food...hahahah
Hugs
M

Friday, October 21, 2005

Three Miles and Clowns



Five times round at Lake Ella is 3 miles. That's what we get minimum when we go running or walking (Nancy and I both have shin splints in the worst way).
Lake Ella is a cool place because you get to people watch. Of course at any given moment one of us is going to have a camera.
So Nancy took this pic of me and a clown there with her phone cam.
I feel like a little kid!
I'm glad i am not scared of clowns in general, although some of them can be kinda iffy....
Hugs
M

Hmmm....One griping session and that is it...

Feeling half sad today.

I miss some of my friends and simple things.
Simple things like when I was in Tobago I could walk from the house to the beach at King's bay, or go to Manzanilla beach (my favorite one) and sit there for hours.

Good thing I talk to Marcia (my twin sis) every day.
Even just to say Oink (private joke).

I am tired because I stayed up late. I don't want to do that anymore.

I haven't cooked in a week because I am scared of lighting the pilot light. I can have the maintenence people do it but I despise gas stoves.

I think some things are so unfair...like people always expecting me to be perfect.
They really do.
If I make a mistake and mess up, no matter how small then its a big deal to be harped on forever.
However if they made mistakes (and believe me they have made MANY) in their lives I am always the first to disregard that because there is so much more to a person than their mistakes.

So I think that that is so unfair. :(
But whatever...

Other than that I think I am reallly thankful and blessed for what I have and the people I know. I know such great people....they are so different and I keep meeting more...
And too funny!
Hugs M

Thursday, October 20, 2005

Crazy Stuff in Trinidad


Well they think that the Coral Reef broke down, but we had a mini Tsunami hit us on the weekend.

That has never happened before to us...It is kind of scary. I like that beach at Maracas.
It's definately not my favorite but it is a good beach.

You can see the waves all huge. They are never like that in Maracas. People were running to get away. I think that we have never experienced anything like that, so they didn't take it as seriously as they should. I am glad it wasn't worse than it was.

It flooded the parking lot at the front of the beach.
I think this is really awful. If it happened once, it may happen again.
WORSE...
I really can't belive that this happened to us. Stuff like this never really happened to us..In other countries but not to us.

I don't think anyone was hurt as a result of this but to get to Maracas Bay, there is a steep winding hilly road with no or very little guard rails on the sides.

There are deep ravines that your car can fall into if you go off the road. That is what happened here.
It happens all the time and people die. That is why Maracas is not my favorite beach.
Check out this car in the ravine.
If you are thinking "oh there are plants down there that will cushion them" then think again.
There are snakes and all kinds of poisonous bugs and plants.
Stinging nettle is the worst. Tiny needles in your arm and you have to wait to get them plucked out.
In the meantime the pain is awful.

I have been on so many hikes with the Biological Society and for Botany class where someone always got the dreaded stinging nettle needles in their arm or wherever. It's not a good thing.
Then the bette rouge/chiggers.
They burrow into your skin or something wherever you haven't oiled up. They get into you and they itch so bad for days.
It swells.
I can't think about this any more.

M

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Anais Nin

I like to read and recently discovered Anais Nin.
All I have to say is: If she were alive today she would probably be a good friend of mine if I met her.
She thinks like me (a little). You can tell from her writing. (Let me put a little disclaimer...one part of me thinks like she thinks)
This is an excerpt from "The House of Incest" (not totally what it sounds like).

"The muffled, close, half-talk of soft-fleshed women. The men she had embraced, and the women, all washing against the resonance of my memory. Sound within sound, scene within scene, woman within woman -- like acid revealing an invisible script. One woman within another eternally, in a far-reaching procession, shattering my mind into fragments, into quarter tones which no orchestral baton can ever make whole again."

Wow! I highly recommend "The Diary of Anais Nin".
Here is an excerpt from the early diary:

"December 29, 1927 - And yet whenever women find an emptiness in their lives they don’t seek the cause of it within themselves, in their spiritual and intellectual life; no; they seek a man, they turn destructively upon the husband as if he were to blame, upon the children.

They turn to mere physical sensation, to base deception---I can’t understand. . . I realize that I am now doing nothing but fulfilling dreams, nothing but materializing images, using my will to make all my desires tangible.

Of course, I never dreamed all that I am doing. When I was younger I imagined my dancing, my writing and marriage, though not quite like the real one, which surpasses the conceptions of a child.
My imagination has been my lamp......


Every day I feel surer of myself, my desires soar higher. I feel power in myself, conviction. If it is conceit, a vast empty bubble of vanity, an illusion as false as my old modesty was false; if I am deceived intellectually, by the fireworks of my life, if its ascension is the ascension of self-glory; if there is no spiritual value and philosophical significance to my life, then there is no truth and no sincerity in this world, because no woman ever looked down into herself with as much cold criticism, no woman ever analyzed her ideas and actions more carefully, none was ever more doubtful of herself, more self-deprecating, more fearful of hypocrisy, more terrified of lies, more eager for truth, than I. You, my Journal, alone, know that."
Wow...I know I relate sometimes to this. But this is not totally me. There is really little Christian element in her writing at all. I don't think there needs to be really, but she writes or wrote a lot of erotica, and for the time that she wrote, her stuff was kind of explicit. I really like her style though.
Anais Nin...Even her name is great.
Hugs
M

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Open House

Janice and I went to an Open House thrown by one of my friends.
She and her husband bought a house that was built in the 1930's in Tally and are going to renovate and restore it before they move in.
It's kind of hard to explain how the house looks. I wish I had a picture, but the best thing I think would be to tell you to picture your grandma's house on the inside, and think of southern old, red brick houses on the outside, in a quiet neighborhood.

The open house was really great. They had wine and cheese and cold meat/salami but that wasn't the most interesting thing.
Janice and I found a little closet that when you go in, the wood smells of the past. It smelled to me like my grandma's old house where she had a lot of suitcases of her clothes from the 1930's and 40's and her old jewelry. You could look through the clothes and dress up and pretend you were in olden days (LOL olden days: the 1940s).

So we sniffed at the wood in there for a long time. My friend caught us doing it and she told us to keep on doing what we were doing! I think it is so funny...she was just so chipper about everything...most people would have looked at us like we were crazy. Or maybe she has already decided and accepted the fact that we are kooky LOL!

The rest of the house had little nooks and crannies all over. We found the basement which was creepy enough to hold our interest and make us keep the door propped WIDE open when we went down there.

My friend's brother in law took us up to the attic.
The stairs were so steep, you really had to be careful going up there. Then once we got up there, there was only room for one person to really walk on the beams..they were a little unstable and the rest of it was that insulating material, that if you stepped on it, you would fall through...so we stayed there a little while talking about it but then I got a little scared about the steps so we went down.

Of course we met some great and interesting people there. But I think this time the house was what kept me going because of all the little details of it...The doors had locks that went with these tiny keys that you saw in the Alice in Wonderland or Enid Blyton or Charles Dickens books...It was amazing. The house smelled old..Good old...like memories.

Janice's mom bought a historic house which she is going to turn into a tea house.

I love that idea because I have been to a great tea house in Trinidad at the guest house named PAX.


It's near the Mount St. Benedict Monastery, and I always made up stories about the type of people that lived in there when I passed it!
At tea time they have British tea ...cakes, teas , scones etc.

But the magical thing was that they had a small fountain and a feeder with sweet honey water, so at tea time the hummingbirds and honey creepers would flock around and butterflies would also come...I am telling you it was like being in a magic place...I love old houses.

I also like plantation houses in Trinidad.
Hugs M

In You

This is another cool poem by my friend Ron.

In You
If I could look into your eyes up close
I would see into your heart
A river of warm love that flows out into this world so cold

If I could see into your mind
I would see all your dreams come flashing before me
The dreams of love peace and harmony
That you wish for all to know

If I could look deep into your soul
I would know that you yearn
For all to live in this world so happily

For in your Heart you do cry out
A song like a sweet lullaby
That is so refreshing it makes our hearts yearn
For the love that you want
And the love that you share

Within your inner being
I do yearn to know
For it is you that I love
And it is you that I know
One day will be sitting here
With me
Holding each other eternally…..Ron.C

Monday, October 17, 2005

My Birthday Part 3


Ok now my birthday week is OFFICIALLY over!
It was the best!
On Friday night I went with Janice and Willy to see 'Two For The Money' I really liked that show. The best was hanging out with Janice and Willy. They are too funny...we had a story telling session and Willy with his New York-Italian accent was too much!

Then on Saturday we got invited to watch football and have BBQ at someone's house. It was okay till Janice and I started to feel ill because of the cats...Janice's allergies were flaring and my throat started to close up. We had to get out of there! So we only spent an hour.

On Saturday night we went to Masa and requested our favorite waiter Paul.
He decided on law school and had just taken his LSAT diagnostic.
He feels confident about the exam.
Here we are with Paul. We even saw his mom there. She had come to pick up an order of this special fish that they needed for a cook out at his dad's church.
You should see her.
She was so tiny and sweet.

Paul 'bought' us dessert. Fried cheese cake and vanilla icecream. It's soooo good. He was great the whole night. I love it!

Then we went over to Cafe Cabernet. We sat at the bar area close to where the jazz band was going to play.
That was the best place to sit because we had a good view of EVERYTHING!

We talked to this guy who was sitting next to us. He was reallly interesting and funny and bought us some wine.
His name is Trent.
Here we are with him.

We actually saw a lot of people we knew, Janice's friends mainly. I had met a couple of them a long time ago and had forgotten I had met them! They had to remind me where and when....

Then we found out that the bartender was celebrating his 30th birthday as well!
We talked to him a lot between customers.
He found out about my birthday too, and made me a special drink called Eyes Wide SHUT....I think that is one of my favorite drinks now...It was soooo good!

He is actually opening a business in December called NECTAR which will be a coffee and wine bar place thingy. So he said he will keep us in touch about when the opening will be and everything.
Here we are with Eric the bartender.

The crazy thing is that customers kept buying him shots. He had about 10 of them while we were there.
We asked him if he had someone to take him home.
Thankfully he did.

Then at the end when we were about to leave....he erased our tab so we ended up spending nothing in there....WOW ...
He was just soooo nice to us.
The great thing is that when Janice and I go out, that always happens!
I love it!
Hugs M

Friday, October 14, 2005

My Birthday Part 2

My Co-workers/ friends, Sandi and Guy took me to Kool Beanz for lunch yesterday. I had a good time there and enjoyed my food.. We had a wait though...geez

They didn't enjoy their food because they ordered some lamb patties and didn't like the taste of it.
I was laughing inwardly because I had suggested the fish earlier. That was what I had and it was great. Sandi tasted it and loved it too...
I love it when I'm right!

Later Ana, Nancy and Janice took me out for dinner (Olive Garden).
I had a blast with them! The waiters came out and sang Happy Birthday...I laughed at that because they had to sing it to at least three other people after me...I wonder if they get upset over that :)


Then I asked our waiter to take a pic of us. Yeah he messed up the first one and I had him do it again...Here it is!
From l to r: Me, Ana, Nancy, Janice.

The interesting thing about this picture is
1. We all look great hahah
2. If you look in the background there is a guy with his head turned in our direction.
Well the whole time we were there.

I saw him and his friends trying to listen in on our conversation.
Turns out that his guy friend there was celebrating a birthday too.

The funny thing is that when the waiters came out to sing Happy Birthday to his friend, he was really upset! He didn't like the attention.

Here is me at the table trying to look cute! Haha
Hugs M

Thursday, October 13, 2005

Three Things: FYI

There are a lot of get to know you exercises out there. Here is one I liked so I decided to do it.

Three Names You Go By:
1. Marsha
2. Marsha
3. Marsha (get it?!)

Three Parts of Your Heritage:
1. African
2. African
3. African (I haven't done any family trees at all to see if there was impropriety back in the slavery days)

Three Things That Scare You:
1. Bad illness or injury
2. Frogs/Toads
3. Unpredictablity (like when people are unstable- I've had bad experiences with vagrants in Trinidad)

Three of Your Everyday Essentials:
1. My glasses
2. Winterfresh gum
3. Exercise

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. Skirt (red and black plaid)
2.Black shirt
3. High heeled pumps (black)

Three of Your Favorite Bands or Musical Artists (at the moment):
1. John Mayer
2. Lauryn Hill
3. Sade

Three of Your Favorite Songs - at the moment:
1. Back to You- John Mayer
2. HE still Loves Me- Beyonce and Various Artists (Fighting Temptations Soundtrack)
3. King of Sorrow- Sade

Three Things You Want in a Relationship (other than Real Love):
1. Open communication always about everything
2. Loyalty
3. Fun

Two Truths and a Lie (can you guess which is the lie???):
1. I like to write
2. I love sales
3. I adore onions in my food

Three PHYSICAL Things about the Opposite Sex that Appeal to You:
1. Nice hands (That gets me good)
2. Eyes that slant SLIGHTLY downward on the outer corners (kind eyes)
3. Tall

Three of Your Favorite Hobbies:
1. Anything crafts
2. Travel and cultural activities
3. Writing and Reading

Three Things You want to do really badly right now:
1. Sleep -kinda tired
2. Eat something light - kinda hungry
3. Talk to my friend

Three Places You Want to go on Vacation:
1. Australia (dream vacation)
2. LA with Janice
3. Europe, again with Janice and my sis because she speaks almost every language... hahah

Three Things You Want to Do Before You Die:
1. Go sailing on a yatch with my friends
2. Travel round Asian pacific countries and write about it
3. Write write write

Three Ways that you are stereotypically a Chick/Guy:
1. I want what I want, when I want it
2. Grossed out by gross stuff
3. Love pretty things and things that smell nice.

Three things you do daily:
1. Pray because I am needy that way
2. Talk to my sis and my friends
3. Massage my tummy (some Philipino ladies taught me how)

Three people I would like to see take this quiz:
1. Janice
2. Christian Le Blanc
3. Clint Eastwood

Hugs M

Miss Universe, Miss World


All the countries except for US make a big deal about the Miss Universe and Miss World competition.

I don't really follow it anymore except to see if Trinidad makes it into the top 10 which we do often.

We've had two Miss Universes, a lot of runner ups, one Miss World and runner ups for Miss World
In 1977 Janelle Penny Commissiong won Miss Universe.

Bob Barker was the host for the show and she was the first Black woman to win that.


She also got the Miss Photogenic prize!
It was great (she also had attended my high school).

She is a sucessful business woman now and owns a boat building/yacht building company called Bowen Marine.



Then in 1998 we had Wendy Fitzwilliam who won it.

She was the second Black woman to win (haha BOTH from Trinidad!).
Better than that she is a lawyer and a children's AIDS advocate.




Then we had Giselle Laronde who won Miss World in 1986. She beat out Halle Berry for that title too! I was surprised to read that Halle enetered that competition. I think they look a little bit alike.
She is actually a franchise owner for the Miss Trinidad, Miss World competition.


I'm proud so I like to tell about it....
Hugs M

Uniforms and Such


Even though I don't remember high school as being the best time because of the amount of work we had to do in order to get into University, I still kinda had some fun.

Just remember we were teenagers and somewhat immature.

A group of us Kim, Marsha B., Me, Abigail, and Sharlene really used to yuck it up in the library, talking about Antonio Sabato Jr., the Preferred Stock model, and Shemar Moore.

Check out the uniforms. I really liked them for the ties.

Oh yes..it was an all girl Anglican school(Bishop Anstey High). Our motto was Non Sine Pulvere Palman (Not without dust the palm. Translation : you have to work your butt off)

They felt that boys would be a distraction and stop us from being able to get to know ourselves as women etc. I tend to agree.
We did have a brother school Trinity College, but nobody really cared for doing any activities with those guys. At Christmas we were FORCED to have a Christmas mas with them and then all 700 of them would crowd into our school...

I think we all prefered guys from Queen's Royal College.
At that time I really could care less about them but they were definately better looking than the Trinity boys, and they seemed more fun.
I say 'seem' because I wasn't allowed as a rule to have guy friends at all at that age.

Those were the days (I still like Anotonio by the way, and he looks exactly the same- LOL).

Here are a couple of pics of some of us in high school. These are 17 year olds and we were having our last day hurrah before GCSE exams, which are these awful exams that help you get into University.

(Most of us had already taken SAT exams because the recruiters from Barry University, MIT and other places come down in early Spring to talk to us about doing it...so we have a back up plan. Most of us stayed in Trinidad but the real shining stars like Gillian Elcock who scored 1510 and got full scholarships to MIT went away).

Anyway GCSE are the hardest exams any of us ever took and when we got to University we couldn't believe it...The exams in University were way easier than the highschool leaving ones...UGH.
These are British exams also.
So students in England were also taking these at the same time. But still I love the British school system.

One thing though about our school. They were strict about behavior etc.
We couldn't eat and walk down the street in our uniforms, we had to go straight home after school and not hang out with people from other schools down town in our uniforms.
Parents would call the principal and tell on us if they saw us hanging out downtown in uniform.

We weren't allowed to change clothes either after school to go downtown. That would just be asking for trouble they said.
We definately were not supposed to talk to Maxi taxi conductors: they were the scourge of society.
I will blog about them later.

We had rules about fraternizing with boys....which most of us didn't anyway because of our parents rules.

One girl got pregnant and couldn't come back to school because they said it would be a bad influence on us to have her around.
So I guess we learned a lesson because later on, one girl managed to hide her pregnancy under bigger shirts.
The whole school knew and nobody told the tecahers or principal. She was the head writer for the school magazine and she was really great!
We couldn't tell on her!
I liked her because she liked my stories that I wrote hahahh!
Hugs M

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

My Birthday Part 1


Last night Janice and I went to LOS for my birthday proper.

I had so much fun. But I had a headache after from the sangria which I really liked because theirs is homemade.

Ok you know how I said that when Janice and I go out together we get a lot of attention?

Well in the past when we have been to Los with other people it's been normal.

Now that we have gone alone, we got a special invite to the owner's private parties that they have at LOS! Rafa invited us! Here is a pic of me and Rafa.


We were so shocked!

But I am glad...I have never been to a full blown Mexican party before...only seen it on TV. They had one last Sunday for someone's wedding!

Did I mention that I love different cultures?

Janice was thrilled beyond belief. So much so that I got this gorgeous pic of her! hahah!


Well traditionally at LOS, for your birthday, they give you a shot of Tequila and make you wear a sombrero.

I didn't want a shot of anything and I refused to wear the hat because so many people had worn it before...so they came and sang and fed me icecream.

Here they are feeding me icecream.

It was funny because I was laughing and trying to look cute at the same time and Rafa kept shoveling it in.


Oh and here is a pic of 'Sly Tony', looking at Janice when he should be singing my Birthday song! That's why Janice took the pic!:)

This is a funny picture because Rafa seems to be always close (lurking) by when Tony is around. Rafa was feeding me icecream there!

We should call him Uncle Rafa because he keeps saying. "Be Careful, Keep your eyes open!"
He is the best!
Hugs M

Earthquakes and sadness

When I went home I saw some news about the earthquake in Pakistan and that made me sad.
You should see all the kids they are finding, scared and screaming with their parents gone.

There was one little girl, who was screaming so much because she still felt like she was trapped in rubble and nobody could calm her down.

How can we help?

:(

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

I'm 30 Today!

And I'm moving to my new place.
I love it! (But you know moving is always stressy :( UGH)
I also love that Bravo TV came up with this great show GREAT THINGS ABOUT BEING 30.
According to the show now I'm:
1. More sophisticated
2. More responsible
3. 20 again (30 is the new 20)
4. More relaxed
6. Supposed to remember the 80s and love it! (I don't love the fashion though)
5. A ton of other cool stuff

Yeah I had that stuff in the bag a looong time ago! Tee Hee :)
It made me feel better!
Hahah!
Check out Janice and me.
I'll let you guys know how the celebrations go. I've had tons of invites so far for lunches and dinners this week, so I'm gonna be a little swamped. I hope my stomach can take it! I gotta put pics with me and some of my other favorite people on here. Ana, Nancy, Me.

Thanks JANICE and SANDI for the B'day greets, and Tiffany in Minnesota, and my twin sis who sent me money while I sent her a colonic cleanse (it's what she wanted!). Thanks Mommy for calling me at 5 am to ask how old I was...Hahahah
I am messengering with my twin sis and she said that Mummy keeps reminding us that we were already born at 5 am...

Check out this pic of me and Sheryl, a great co-worker. Her birthday is today also but she turned 40! Neither of us look our age...YEAH!!!!!!!!!!

Hugs
M

Monday, October 10, 2005

Attention: The Down Side of Cute

When Janice and I go out together anywhere, we seem to get a lot of attention. Most of the time it's good and fun. Some of the time it really is not so cool at all!

I don't like when people we don't know kinda get too up in our faces all the time. It means I have to be on my guard all the time. Luckily there are always people who seem to be looking out for us.
Like Rafa (short for Raphael), my absolute favorite person at LOS.
He is really great.
I met his wife and sons at the mall one day.

Here we are at LOS.
Rafa is very nice, very Catholic, and a lot of fun.
He says stuff like "Be careful of Los Gigolos!"
Like he really needs to tell ME that! Haha

Then there are other people who are very smarmy and inappropriate when you are nice to them. Like this guy taking the pic with Janice.
UGH. This guy......
Very up in our face, especially Janice's face. I decided I wasn't going to engage him in too much conversation. I deleted my pic with him because he was so grabby, in the pic I looked scared, or uncomfortable at least.

Very inappropriate and he was 'less than honest' and told Jan that he wasn't married, when she'd seen him at the mall one day with her and his kid!
Ugh..I don't like it when guys do that....
Some people suck.... Ok wait! That aspect of him sucked but I have to say in other ways he was really nice. I can't write off the entire person just because one aspect of him may be questionable.
Most of the people we meet all the time are great!
Hugs M

Sunday, October 09, 2005

Fiction and Regret

I like to write fiction based heavily on events that have occured.

I am writing about a series of events that took place in a matter of a few weeks.
Small things like a visit to a video store. A drive through a neighborhood.
A walk round a lake
Cooking a meal-maybe artichoke and crab and herb butter.
Watching a movie
Cats with interesting names
Sensory overload and winding down.

I got some feedback on one of these 'shorts'
I like reading it back to myself when it's really good. When it draws me in.
But then I need to know what happens next.
Only there is no 'next' unless I write it or someone else writes it.
I am hoping that I can write my way to reality. Which means that I write something that hasn't happened yet, and as a result of me writing it down, it happens.
Is it possible to write one's way into a situation, an experience, a friendship, a relationship?
Now THAT would be interesting!
Hugs M

Piel Canela

I went to Los with Janice on Friday night for dinner. There were singers there. One from Domincan Republic, and one from Mexico.
The guy from Dominican Republic came up to me and said he was going to sing a song dedicated to me called 'Piel Canela'. I was very flattered, because the song was amazing when they sang it to me. Here are the lyrics in English and Spanish. Music makes you really feel better when everything else pales...

Piel Canela [Cinnamon Skin]
Let the universe be without stars
Or the wide sea lose its immensity
But don't ever let the blackness of your eyes die
And keep the cinnamon of your skin as it is
If the rainbow were to lose its beauty
And the flowers their perfume and color
My sadness wouldn't be as great
As it would be without your love
Your are my everything
You
And you alone
You are all that matters
You
And no one else
Black eyes, cinnamon skin
That make me despair
You are everything...

Piel Canela- Spanish
Que se quede el infinito sin estrellas
O que pierda el ancho mar su immensidad
Pero el negro de us ojos que no muera
Y el canela de tu piel se quede igual
Si perdiera el arco iris su belleza
Y las flores su perfume y su color
No seria tan inmensa mi tristeza
Como aquella de quedarme sin tu amor
Me importas tu
Y tu y tu
Y solamente tu
Y nadie mas que tu
Ojos negros piel canela
Que me llegan a desesperar
Y nadie mas que tu
Y nadie mas que tu

They also sang Guantanamera for us too!
Hugs M

Thursday, October 06, 2005

My 'SHORTS'

Gosh I made a mistake with this one. On close examination of the site I linked to, I found it was really smarmy. So I had to delete my "dating" post.

I write short stories, that I can never read over. I just send them away on to friends, because if I read them over I hate them.
That's the only place in my life where I am remotely perfectionist.

I joined Toastmasters and wrote three versions of my first speech, then didn't use any of them. Ugh!
The first speech is an icebreaker to let the audience know about you. I ended up ironically using a personal ad format. That went over surprisingly well!

My latest three page short was about the first part of a first date. I thought it was pretty good, so I sent it on to the person I wrote it for, and then I deleted it.

Suddenly I couldn't stand to have it around anymore. I know it's in my sent mail but I won't retrieve it.

I haven't gotten any feedback on it, but I don't really expect to...sigh.
Hugs M

SINGLE Wants......

Well just about all of my friends right now are single. Single and not seeing anybody, and that includes me.

I think right now for me and a couple of them, it is ok for us to be single and have fun with each other, because having gotten out of some hairy relationships in the past we are all probably just grateful for the rest! :)

But we talk when we go out, and we all want certain things. The women, most of us want similar things, and here are the things we really agree on. I will break them down into categories.
Character, Personality, Emotional Development

Personality
1. Must like to DO STUFF!
STUFF means: concerts, plays, games, movies, travel - all over, hobbies...

This is really important to me. I think some guys start out doing these things to get you then revert to their REAL selves later on...That really bums me out!

I don't have to do something like this ALL the time but please.....!

Loves their friends and family

Romantic: will feed you crab dipped in herb butter- AFTER he's gotten the meat out of the shell for you, when he's starving, and hasn't eaten yet and has the shakes!


Character
Honesty

Someone with a heart for GOD and a close relationship with him. Close enough that he is obedient to what God says is important for his life (i.e all that stuff in that book called the Bible) and wants to please GOD by his actions- This should be number one here but I had to put Honesty first.
(This is MY requirement).

Non judgemental (judgemental guys are some of the biggest hypocrites ever- and I know I sound judgemental here but I have met my share, and it really wears me out listening to them then seeing them in action!)

Integrity

Loyalty to true friends and true family and can balance the important and not so important things (I say true because we all know how people can be)


Emotional Maturity

Confidence- Easy to obtain without being obnoxious...You can believe your way into confidence. Act 'as if' for a while, and you will begin to believe it yourself...It's how I got mine.

Leave the temper tantrums at the door: if you are 32 and get screaming mad that your computer isn't going fast enough...That's a shame... stay single

Able to let people be who they are...Patience is a virtue, you can be a good friend and lead by example.

Introspective and intouch with their emotions

Communication: Can let you express your thoughts and emotions without getting defensive or trying to make you feel bad about your views.

Can share their burdens and their all with their partner: Remember that whole Cleaving and Leaving thing...


These are just the short short lists of things because I feel that it is more importat for us to work on ourselves and become people who can give much, and offer much in a relationship.....I think that most of my friends are at that place already (though of course none of us are perfect and we will probably never be).

For now I think we are going to just relax and whatever happens happens. I am ceratinly not going to force anything, because that is when the trouble starts (hahaha).

Umm just one small thing..because I have bad pet allergies I would really appreciate someone who can understand that.
Although I wouldn't mind (for the right person) putting up with a cat, then rushing home to take my allergy pills after my throat begins to swell and I get the itchies! hahah
Hugs M

The Inner Me

This is a poem written by my friend Ron C. I really liked it and I think a lot of people will be able to relate so here goes.

The Inner Me
The inner me that no one will ever see,
I keep it hidden in myself
Because I’m afraid to let it out
In case someone sees just who I am
And rejects what they see.

Ever since I was young I always kept my heart invisible
To all those who may have known me.
I always hide from the sun
So no one could see the inner me.
Wherever I go and what ever I do,
I can never let you know me from the inside
Never minding that you just might like me.

As I walk and as I talk,
I hide in my dreams
And I hide in my heart
From the rest of the world,
Just so they will never know
What’s going on inside me,
Where everything is to be a mystery.

I’m afraid that if I reveal all that I am
And all that I feel
You will not understand,
And make me feel as one who isn’t real.

I don’t want to open up
Or step out in to the day light where the sun shines bright,
I’m afraid of the rejection that comes from being me,
So I hide in this shell,
Not letting myself out into the air
Or flying through the night sky
Like a shooting star way up high.

Never minding I am somebody who has heart,
And is cool in more than just one way
Because I know I am me,
And me is all that I've got
And no one will ever see inside the inner me…..Ron.C

Ok Wow. This is great stuff! Thanks for letting me post this Ron.
Hugs M

Monday, October 03, 2005

Alfie


Saw Alfie, starring Jude Law, Nia Long, Sienna Miller, Marisa Tomei, and Susan Sarandon.

Loved the movie. It didn't do that well at the box office but that's another reason I like it.
If you can wade through the R rated stuff (most of which to be honest was really not that necessary- and no I am not being prudish), it's really a great story. Watched it with and without the commentary.

I guess I have to say why I liked this. Jude plays a cad who sleeps with amazingly beautiful women, and justifies all his actions to himself and us, the audience, but he learns later on that this lifestyle is empty and hurtful not only to the women but to himself. This movie made me like Jude Law for the first time.

My favorite scene in the movie was the scene with Jude Law and Nia Long.

Nia has a 'no nudity' clause in her movie contracts, so they really had to choreograph her romantic scenes with Jude with much more finesse than with the other ladies. They accomplished that in the way she walked (swaying, gliding, skulking), the way she looked at Jude and vice versa (intense and playful).

Even with the music they played, when Jude and Nia laughed, and how they even did the billiards.
If you look closely at how they played the Billiards, they were both kind of slowly swooping and gliding, almost sliding, into the table....who does that in real life?
The lighting was perfect.
They even had Jude walk and move in a totally different way. He was slower, smoother, more soulful. The directors had to of course, have some sultry dancing. Nia was smooth and slow but very artful, and Jude who declared that he could not dance, then followed her lead by leaning into her and just going with the flow ( Isley Brothers- For the Love of You). It was short but very very effective.
Geez...I am going to watch this scene again. This scene did it for me.

I want to see the original starring Michael Cain. He was so much more mean and crass and the women seem much more homely. That means I will feel more sorry for the women.

I enjoyed watching this film.
Hugs M

Gospel Concert: One Church Tour


On Sunday afternoon I went to a gospel concert at my church -Christian Heritage.
It was a full blown concert and I think about 5000 people showed up to see it. Believe me there was a very long line to get in there.

Kurt Carr, Smokey Norful, James Fortune and other groups were there to sing.

Here is the pastor, Dr Ledford letting loose and cutting a rug on stage.

It was really tremendous and the Holy Spirit was definately moving there.
You know the Christian Heritage Church Praise team was just as good as these performers.

I love that church so much.

They even allowed kids on stage to dance if they wanted to which I thought was great. They were too cute for words. Here they are.

Kurt Carr sang his hit 'Sanctuary', and he did the Jump which had everybody in the concert jumping and carrying on.


I have never been to a concert that was so energetic all the way through, and so uplifting. Kurt allowed some audience member up on stage who took over the performance for a while!



I usually wait around to meet the performers but I was so tired by the end that I had to leave. I did meet James Fortune and he is a new rising star so when he hits it big I'll have my picture.

He is also very attractive, and seems to be a very nice and accomodating person. Check us out here in the lobby of the church.

His performance was actually one of my favorites, so I think he will go very far.

Check him out on stage with his back up crew. They are young and talented with great dance moves and everything!
Hugs M

The Colonnade Room

Janice's dad came to town for the Syracuse game.

That night Janice, our friend Mark, and I went with her dad to MASA, on my suggestion.

That's the new Lucy Ho's restaurant (I love that name Lucy Ho!), on Monroe street next to Cafe Cabernet.
It was almost like being in the Colonnade Room in Genoa City- Almost.

The food was really good and we had a great time, but I swear that Janice and I traumatised ourselves people watching and making up stories. By the time my food came out I could only eat one bite because I was so nervous about one of the women that we had conconcted a full blown soap opera about!

We met a great waiter named Paul. He is Korean and his dad is a pastor at a Korean Church in Tallahassee.

He is originally from Philadephia and is considering Law School next year.
I thought he was great and so well spoken...I hope he does the law thing.
He is a philosophy major and religion minor right now.

Here we are at MASA with Paul.

MASA is a great restaurant, and it is one of my favorites now. The owner was this tiny asian man who was walking around filling up water in glasses for customers. I think we were the only ones who knew he was the owner because Paul told us.
We are gonna go again soon I think. Paul told us his work scedule...how great is that!
Hugs M
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